Feb 28, 2020

The One-Finger Salute

Thumbs up to the women’s softball team, who kicked off its season with two victories against the University of the Pacific Tigers. We’re hoping this signals the start of a great new season.

Thumbs down to mono, or perhaps more specifically, the virus the scientific community likes to call infectious mononucleosis. The virus plagues its victims with symptoms similar to the flu, the virus the scientific community likes to call influenza, and lasts, in most cases anywhere from two to six weeks. For college students, the virus can be particularly insidious, making its victims appear to be lazy (or suffering from the virus the scientific community likes to call senioritis) when really, they’re stuck in bed with a backache and a fever.

Thumbs up to “Seinfeld.” We hope you remember the sitcom, famously about “nothing,” that helped usher in the brand of quirky comedy that has defined some of the best television comedies of recent years. These include shows like “Scrubs,” “The Office,” “Arrested Development,” and “Everybody Loves Raymond.” What was that? “Everybody Loves Raymond” wasn’t funny? Yeah, you’re right. Thumbs down to Ray Romano.

Thumbs down to the capacity that competitive card games have to turn brother against brother, friend against friend and can even set couples at odds with one another. We at The Collegian often enjoy passing the time with card games, but also recognize the dangers they can pose to you and your relationships with the people you love. While we don’t want you to give the games up, we just ask you to be careful while playing.

Thumbs down to Valentine’s Day. We at The Collegian are not so much bitter about the holiday as we are flat-out broke.

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