Oct 20, 2019
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Suck it up and walk

As opinion editor, I feel obliged to give this section of The Collegian balance in its content. Aside from politics, this includes the nature of what is being written.

Last week was a high watermark for complaining. Be it the whiteout, banking, student apathy or even dirty words, this section was quite negative.

And so, I feel it is my duty to provide the community at California State University, Fresno with a subject we should all quit complaining about.

Parking.

“What!? You mean when they charge me $60 for a permit and then give me a ticket when I don’t park perfectly and then I can’t find a spot and I have to walk from the Save Mart Center to the North Gym for a class when it’s really hot outside I shouldn’t complain?”

Yep.

You’re reading this on campus right? Look around for a minute. How many people can you see? How many people are in the Free Speech area, and the library, and classrooms?

Now imagine every single one of these people taking up a space 9 feet wide and18 feet long.

“Man, that sure would suck.”

That is the size of a standard parking space, which means that every person you see really is taking up that huge space somewhere (don’t pretend anyone carpools), and they are holding it hostage for hours on end.

We have a little over 20,000 students at this school. You can do the math if you like.

People complain that they get tickets for parking over the white line: “That cop must be filling a quota!”

But if you park far enough over it you prevent the space next door from being used, meaning that even if you’re 4 feet 9-inches tall and weigh 95 pounds you are taking up 18 feet by 18 feet all by your lonesome for the entire duration of your visit.

And of course, the reason walking anywhere is impossible today is that parking lots spread cities out so far. In many American cities there are more parking spaces than people. That precious lot creates the very problem it is supposed to fix.

Take the walk from the SMC to the North Gym: It’s particularly long because half of the walk is over other parking lots, where the early birds are taking up their 9-by-18’s. Perhaps we could solve this problem by having color-coded parking that changes according to your class schedule and where you needed to park at different times of the day and you could get a ticket for being in the right lot at the wrong time or vice versa.

What’s that? That sounds worse? I thought so.

And there’s no need to sugarcoat it (literally), the Central San Joaquin Valley has a weight problem. Some people could use a nice long hike.

I walk to class from my apartment building, which is about the distance of the dreaded Save-Mart-to-North-Gym trek. If parking stickers were less expensive I might be tempted to buy one and hunt down my own 9-by-18, making you park even farther away.

If you really want to park close for cheap, get a motorcycle. The permit for one is $17 and the lot is right next to, you guessed it, the North Gym.

Why? Because bikes take up a tiny space. This issue should follow suit.

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