Sometimes I try to figure out how the Fresno State administration decides when to schedule our holidays. I imagine hazy chicken races held in the Joyal basement.

“And April 6 and March 15 are neck and neck! April 6 wins by a beak! That’s right folks! Spring break starts on April 6 this year! Come back next week for the office coin toss to decide when the spring ’09 semester starts!”

I mean, why do we want a week off four and a half weeks before the end of the semester? I would rather have had it two or three weeks before, or at least graduated on May 15 instead.

But no, that’s not what the administration was thinking about when they made the schedule. I use “thinking” very loosely here. It may be an incorrect word choice, however, because it implies that thought went into the process.

What kind of sick, three-legged dog race would make them decide that giving us a Tuesday off before spring break is in any way acceptable?

Maybe next time they have a “meeting” to plan the schedule, the game they use should be Russian roulette.